Saturday, October 8, 2016

The Grand Scheme of Things

Jesus took the wheel
Jesus Took The Wheel....
   This morning I spent a few hours fully awake, tossing and turning in my bed struggling with the idea that God has a plan for my life. On the K-love radio station, they were talking about "trusting God", "God has a plan", and telling people how many people will be blessed by their ministry.

So, that got me to thinking. If K-love actually believes people should "Trust God" and give, then why do they have to have a fund raiser every 6 months? Why don't they just "Trust God". It is sort of a contradiction, "Hey buddy, trust God and support me. God will take care of you." I just don't like the premise that giving is an act of trusting God. Which brings me to my main point. Is God trustworthy? To be trustworthy a person has to be faithful, truly faithful. I think back over my life and honestly, I can't tell you when God was actually faithful. Sorry. There are a lot of good things in my life, I am certainly "blessed" with a profoundly faithful and patient wife. My daughters are truly blessed in every way, and I can see that God does seem faithful in their lives. My daughter's and I have prayed at times about things that concern them and amazingly God has seemed to answer their prayers.

... Now I am in a raging river....
My life is different. I fancied myself "Called of God" to take the gospel where ever he would lead. I went to an Assemblies of God school and was trained, prepared for a life of service. That was over 30 years ago. Clearly, that was not God's plan.
The final nail, for me, the thing that opened my eyes was seeing some one leave full time employment to enter full time ministry. That event caused me to ask, does God actually have "a plan" for my life? If he does when is that going to happen? Right now, the plan seems to be to put me in a ditch from which I will never escape. Clearly I am not on God's most favored list.

So in the grand scheme of things, I thought to myself this morning, for me, I have to accept the reality that there is no grand scheme of things. Then the image of this car trapped in flood waters came to mind (I saw it online last night ).  I realized Jesus did take the wheel of my life decades ago, but this is where he put me. Some one has to do it I suppose.

Here is the way I see it. God is in control. I cannot become atheistic. I believe the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob does actually rule the universe. I believe the death of Jesus Christ on a Roman cross is the most significant event in history. His death was different from the death of the thousands of others who were also crucified by Rome. As much as I wish I could I cannot un-believe.

...and Jesus left me there.
This is not a rejection of faith in God, it is simply an acknowledgement of the path that God has chosen for me. This is acceptance. We cannot all be Jacob. It is one of the most controversial things in the Bible. The statement of Paul in Romans, that God loved Jacob, but hated Esau. From my perspective in the ditch, Esau was still blessed. He was circumcised, an heir of Abraham, but he was just not that important in the "Grand Scheme of things". So being hated by God, does not mean God just abandons you. He still takes care of  you and yours. You still know who he is but you are not meant for "wonderful" or "great things".

I have great faith in God but I no longer believe that my life has much use to Him or anyone else for that matter. Very similar to the car awash in the flooding waters in the picture. Jesus looks upon me from a far, content with my lot. If it were not so, surely by now something would have changed.

I need the faith to face reality. Truth is truth. Believing things that are demonstrably false is wishful thinking not faith. Faith in God transcends reason, but it does not subvert it.

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